咖啡凉透时，他在画纸右下角落下字迹。笔尖悬在“X”上顿了顿，最终还是空着。

日期或许不重要，重要的是某一刻，有人为了一朵花，追着火车，而他把那瞬间的光与风，都锁进了画里。

晚风从咖啡馆的百叶窗钻进来，吹得画纸轻轻颤动，像有人在远处，正踩着碎金般的霞光，一步步赶来。

"2025.11.X墨西哥".涟昙樾。”

第33章

33提线木偶

酒店，气氛紧张。人群围聚在四周，抬头望向那装饰楼钟，只见一个少年正摇摇欲坠地站在边缘，随时可能纵身跳下。

Yagnis皱着眉头，一脸不悦地问道：“怎么回事？”

沃克利赶忙上前，微微欠身，恭敬地说道：“小姐，请稍等，我们已经在排查了。”他一边说着，一边指挥着手下的人忙碌地穿梭在人群之中。

众人的目光都聚焦在大钟上的少年身上，忍不住议论纷纷。有人小声嘀咕：“现在的年轻人啊，怎么这么冲动。”

另一个人接话道：“就是啊，为了爱要死要活的。”

这话正巧被华誉逢听到，冷冷嗤笑一声，这突兀的笑声瞬间引起了周围人的注意。

华誉逢微微扬起下巴，曾经，他坚定地认为：爱就是爱，不爱就不爱，简单直接，没有任何拖泥带水的余地。

然而，自从遇见了涟昙樾，一切都变得不一样了。对于涟昙樾，他有一种难以言喻的感觉，即便理智告诉他可以选择不爱，但内心却不由自主地沦陷。他常常自嘲，大概这就是人们所说的“得不到的永远在骚动”吧。

看着楼钟上的少年，他穿过人群，小心翼翼地靠近少年，尽量让自己的声音听起来温和：“Brother, don't be hasty. Let's come down and talk things over slowly.”（兄弟，先别冲动，有什么事儿咱们下来慢慢说。）

少年转过头，满脸泪痕：“What's there to talk about? You won't understand. I've lost everything. I loved him with all my heart and soul, made him the center of my life, but he left me. So what's the point of me staying alive?（聊什么？你不会懂的，我什么都没有了，我全心全意地爱他，把他当成生命的全部，可他离开我了，那我活着还有什么意义？）”

华誉逢微微皱眉：“Maybe I understand, maybe I don't. But I do know that love is never the only answer in life. You feel that losing him now makes everything meaningless, but that's just a temporary feeling. Life is a long journey filled with countless possibilities.（我或许懂，或许不懂。但我知道，爱从来不是人生的唯一答案。你觉得此刻失去了他，一切都没了意义，可这只是当下的感受。人生漫漫，充满了无数的可能性。）”

少年苦笑着摇头：“Possibilities? You don't understand at all. I gave so much of my affection, but ended up with this kind of result. Is this fair? It's not fair!!（可能性？你根本不明白，我付出了那么多感情，却得到这样一个结果，这公平吗？这不公平！！）”

华誉逢缓缓走近一步，目光真诚地看着少年：“Fairness? There's no absolute fairness in life, especially when it comes to feelings. It's not a trade; giving doesn't necessarily guarantee an immediate equal return. But that doesn't mean your efforts are worthless.（公平？生活本来就没有绝对的公平。感情这件事更是如此，它不是交易，付出并不一定就能立刻得到同等的回报。但这并不意味着你的付出是没有价值的。）”

爱，在他看来，不过是人的众多情绪之一罢了。

“Human beings, these complex creatures, are full of contradictions, and their emotions are extremely fickle. One moment they can be carried away by passion because of something or someone, and the next moment they can part ways over a trivial matter. The boundaries of feelings are always so blurred in the face of reality that it's hard to tell what's true, false, right, or wrong。”

（人这种复杂的生物，本身就充满了矛盾，情绪更是变幻无常。前一秒还可能因为某件事或某个人而激情上头，可下一刻就可能因为一点小事而分道扬镳，感情的界限在现实面前总是那么模糊不清，让人分不清真假对错。）

他也不知道自己从什么时候开始，会有这样深刻的感悟，会说出这样的话。

或许是在无数个辗转反侧、思念涟昙樾的夜晚，又或许是在一次次与涟昙樾相处的微妙瞬间，那些难以名状的情感，如同细密的丝线，不知不觉间缠绕在他的心间，越缠越紧，让他无法挣脱。

“I understand that feeling. Once I also thought that love should be straightforward, either you get it or you give it up. But later I realized that feelings are far from being that simple and pure. Just like when I like someone, even though I know there may be no outcome, I still can't let it go. But even so, I never considered giving up my life."（我明白那种感觉，曾经我也以为爱就该清清楚楚，要么得到，要么放弃。可是后来我才发现，感情哪有那么简单纯粹。就像我喜欢一个人，明知道可能没结果，可心里还是放不下。但即便如此，我也没想过要放弃自己的生活。）

少年疑惑地看着华誉逢： “So what? In the end, it's still just pain."（那又怎么样？最后还不是痛苦。）

华誉逢笑着，朝他举起了酒杯，琥珀色的液体在杯中荡漾，映着微弱的光：“Pain is indeed inevitable, but it's also a part of life. Whose life can be completely smooth without going through these setbacks? If you jump now, just think, what if you meet the right person in the future? Won't you miss out?（痛苦是肯定的，但这也是生活的一部分啊。谁的人生能一帆风顺，没有经历过这些挫折呢？你要是就这么跳下去了，你想想，以后万一遇到真正合适的人，你岂不是错过了？）”